The virginity gap - Steele Hard

The virginity gap between the sexes has changed.

A porn industry veteran, Hamilton Steele, says that there’s a virginity gap between men and women. He attributes this to societal rewards for female promiscuity. To quote, “No one is compensating a woman for remaining chaste.” In fact, it’s very much the opposite. Even a very plain looking woman can earn significant money, if she’s willing to sell access to her vagina. As testament to this fact, the Internet has seen an unprecedented uptick in platforms who facilitate helping ladies monetize their self-produced pornography. So it should be no surprise that, these social porn media sites are also fueled, in no small part, by a surge in virginal and sexually inept male users.

For older male virgins, porn has become their sex life.

A pornographer has a different world perspective compared to the average person. As porn has become a dominate force in modern society, women are catching up to men in its consumption. While the growing market of female viewers should be reason to celebrate from a pornographer’s perspective, porn addiction effects women differently and long-term that may mean a complete change in the market. Because unlike their male counterparts who substitute porn for sex to the detriment of interpersonal relationships. In females, this hypersexualization tends to lead to sexual promiscuity and extreme liberal sexual attitudes when it comes to relationships.

Among addicts the virginity gap is even more pronounced, because the female porn addicts are rarely virgins, while too much porn for men means that they have trouble connecting with women. Female porn addiction appears to come in two flavors ;

(1) Hypersexuality which often proceeds a sex addiction
(2) Insecurities and/or frigidity while still having an addiction to watching porn.

A pornographer obviously sees a lot of women who want to pursue a career in the adult industry. Just a decade ago, money was the dominate reason for wanting to be a pornstar. Today, almost as many females sex addicts, view being an adult performer as a means to indulge their cravings and secondarily still manage to keep a roof over their heads. During a quick interview, one 20 year old girl happily said that she views a porn career as a way to get rodeo fucked daily, without having to worry about becoming homeless. When asked about how long she has been looking at porn and at what age she lost her virginity, she responded that probably been looking at adult videos since she was 8. She had sex for the first time on her 13th birthday, unbeknownst to her 30 year old partner, who she led to believe that she was 19.

Females with insecurities, depression and/or who are frigid, also often find their way into the sex industry. But that is nothing new in the porno world. Porn video producers and performers are most often very complimentary towards female talent, stoking egos is part of the game. So the insecure find themselves the center of attention and of course with make-up, cameras, and being called models, they feel attractive. Whereas the appeal to purely frigid females is that sexual acts are staged and sometimes almost mechanical. They’re not expected to enjoy the sex, just to make it look good. Furthermore, the relationship with their sexual partners are over when a producer says “It’s a wrap, you can go home” . It’s the large increase of this kind of woman entering the business that is unusual, and once again for many of them they started having sex at a very young age.

The virginity gap between men and women from porn’s perspective.

The Internet instills a false belief that males are the winners in the current situation. Every man believes he can quickly create his fan page and he’ll be a success because hoards of females will pay to see him naked and masturbating. The paradox is that most women have almost no interest in solo male pornography and they gravitate towards the multi-performer and lesbian videos. They want to see a woman enjoying herself. It’s gay men predominantly, who want to see a man alone. And even this demographic can be fickle, because homosexual males will also watch heterosexual porn, when the male talent is well endowed, attractive or has some other arousing feature.

More evidence for the male vs female virginity gap is demonstrated by those men who are hoping to become pornstars. There will never be a shortage of guys that want to be in the sex industry. Some find their way into a pornographer’s office and many them are both extremely well endowed and physically attractive. But those qualities, although preferable, are no guarantee to a porn career, because more often than not, size is NOT enough to get the job done. Unfortunately, for the past 5 years, many of these hopeful males are still virgins, having never had sex in their personal lives, they believe that the hours they have devoted to watching the finished product makes them an expert. These hopeful swordsmen, rarely have the stamina or control to make a porn, not to mention a complete lack of finesse with the female talent.

No porn producer can (or will) take a chance on a guy that hasn’t had some kind of active sex life, prior to his interest in doing porn. Viagra can’t fix broken… It can only make what works even better. A 30 year old virgin male has usually watched thousands of hours of pornography and at best they have erection and attention deficit problems. Any pornographer that doesn’t have access to a large pool of talent most often will favor taking a chance on men that are at least over 40. Money is on the line and there’s so much competition that profit margins are low. So when looking for straight male talent, it’s often necessary to be the porn industry equivalent to an FBI profiler.

The unifying factor between the sexes is early exposure to porn.

The pornographic industry has always been on the cutting edge of both technology and societal trends. It’s also resilient to an arguable fault as even the most theocratic and totalitarian governments have been unable to eliminate demand for it; on the contrary attempts to do so only increase its desirability. So the industry can be thought of as the proverbial canary in the coal mine, when it comes to alerting us to societal changes or problems. Only, when the bird dies, instead of alerting everyone to flee the danger zone, pornographers will attempt to make money selling images of dead canaries. What many porno veterans are predicting is an eminent normalization of sex with children. But the shape that normalization takes will depend greatly on society’s relationship with the sex industry. Will children become exploited in the mine, or will it be boarded up, and the old ways of marrying pubescent girls to older established men, be rediscovered? Or, do we still have hope to build a better and a more appealing future?