Male Sex Workers suffer abuse and hatred just like their female counterparts.

Beau, a gigolo and French pornstar almost died from injuries he suffered at the hands of a client. A married woman in her 50s, had used his services for a little more than 2 years. He describes their relationship as very amicable and nothing sexually perverse. Her reasons for using his services seemed to be something other than purely sexual, she wanted the attention and to be made to feel that she was desired. The 20 year difference in age between Beau and herself only seemed to make their meetings more special.

But all that changed when unknown to Beau, her husband had left her for a much younger woman. Their ensuing encounter, started with conversation over a glass of wine, a casual exchange that demonstrated a familiarity and comfort level. However, she had spiked Beau’s drink with Roofies (Rohypnol). She then proceeded to unleash her jilted fury on the man before her, cutting and burning his penis and inserting spoons and forks in his anus. When she was satisfied with what she had done, she had somehow got Beau into her car and drove him the bois de Vincennes where she left him at the park’s entrance.

He was found by a firefighter walking his dog who realized something was wrong and called for an ambulance. Beau was taken to the hospital and it was discovered that 2 dinner forks were still inside of him. Hospital staff were professional, seeking only to render assistance, whereas everyone associated with helping rape victims were accusatory. His sexual orientation was recorded as gay despite his insistence that he wasn’t. He was also questioned about his drug use, he was sober accept for the Roofies. Finally, when it became known that was a pornstar, everyone lost interest in him, with few openly saying he probably got hurt in a porn shoot gone wrong.

Sex work is still work.

Sex work has long been a contentious issue, with debates centered on its legality, morality, and the impact it has on individuals and society. In recent years, sex worker advocacy groups have emerged to fight for the rights and protection of sex workers, often focusing on the experiences of female sex workers. However, male sex workers are marginalized and ignored within these organizations, leaving them vulnerable to abuse, discrimination, and violence. The argument many associated with these groups make is that male sex workers exist in very small numbers and that their focus is on trying to help the largest number of people possible. Perhaps Beau had said it best, “This is classic feminist hypocrisy. Only women can be victimized.”

No one has ever done any adequate research and there’s almost no interest to investigate what percentage of men are prostitutes compared to that of women. Literally in a textbook in academic circles, male prostitution is estimated at 10 to 54 % of the sex worker population. (Allman 1999). A variation that is too large to be taken seriously accept to show that nobody really knows the reality of the situation. Andrew Fogg (2017) writing for Medium noted that 42% of the prostitution ads on Adultwork were males, yet organizations and governments consider 20% a generous estimate when factoring resources.

A large portion of male prostitutes begin as strippers or porn talent, so they are able to use more direct tactics, such as word of mouth, to ply their trade. Male sex workers agree that they exist in much larger number than what’s generally believed and in last decade, male prostitution has been growing. The secrecy is the result of a 3 fold problem.

• (1.) The women and couples who use their services demand much greater discretion.
• (2.) The majority of men chose to be silent about being raped because of public mockery.
• (3.) When they do attempt to speak up about being sexually assaulted, they face possible double victimization. Men are frequently accused by the police and support groups of being the rapist, trying to conceal their crime by pretending to be the victim.

Male prostitutes either know or quickly learn that, given the popular prejudices against them, it’s safer to accept what has been done to them and not speak about it to anyone. It’s a brutal reality, taunted by the anti-rape slogan “Believe every woman”; because no one is saying, “Believe every victim.”

Sex worker advocacy groups and victim resources tend to focus solely on “the weaker sex” with the argument that they have historically faced greater violence. (Budd et al., 2019). Considering the current conditions which say “no man should be believed” and that men can only be assailants and never victims, then perhaps it’s time to question historical accuracy. Today everyone knows that history is written by the winners which logically means that male victims of sexual assault are among history’s ultimate losers.

In 2024 there is a growing acknowledgment of diverse gender identities. Group identity politics dominate the government, the media and academia. The overwhelming problem with this is that the traditional male identity is considered the evil patriarchy and blamed for all problems. It’s therefore unfortunate that old biases against men, rampant within the sex work industry, perpetuate the invisibility of male sex workers (Budd et al., 2019). Additionally, the sex worker rights movement are linked to the broader fight for women’s and LGBTQ+ rights, further contributing to the marginalization of male sex workers (Sanders, 2018).

The calls for inclusive advocacy continue to be very elusive when the discussion turns to men. Male sex workers face increased risks of violence, abuse, and exploitation due to their invisibility within advocacy groups (Budd et al., 2019). They may also struggle to access essential health services, such as HIV prevention and treatment, as these services are often tailored to the needs of those who present female (World Health Organization, 2019).

Assaulting a male sex worker should not be more acceptable.

After organizing a sex event, the client paid for the male sex worker’s ride home. The driver recognized the man from his work as a porn-star and asked for oral sex. When he politely declined his offer with a comment that he was tired and not mentally prepared for a male-to-male physical encounter. The driver became hostile and sprayed his passenger with what appeared to be bear spray. He was kicked out of the vehicle and left stranded, at apx 3:30am, several miles from populace. To this day, the ride sharing service has never followed up correspondences. Lawyers have been either quick money shysters or very reluctant to take the case without steep financial reimbursement. Law enforcement is obviously also, not an option – The author (me) of this article is the victim in this case

References

Allman Dan. (1999) M is for Mutual, A is for Acts: Male Sex Work and AIDS in Canada. Toronto: University of Toronto, HIV Social, Behavioural and Epidemiological Studies Unit

Bimbi David S. (2007) Male Prostitution: Pathology, Paradigms and Progress in Research. Journal of Homosexuality. 53(1–2):7–35.

Budd, J., Bell, B., & Campbell, R. (2019). Understanding and responding to the sexual health needs of men who sell sex: A review of the literature. Sexually Transmitted Infections, 95(7), 482-487.

Fogg, A. (2014). <Gender differences amongst sex workers online | by Andrew Fogg | Medium>

Sanders, T. (2018). Sex work, gender and the politics of inequality. International Journal of Gender, Science and Technology, 10(2), 209-229.

World Health Organization. (2019). <HIV and Sex Workers>

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A full-bodied orgasm play a crucial role in the mental health of women. Research has shown that a full-bodied orgasm can have positive effects on mood, stress reduction, and overall well-being. Additionally, a lack of orgasm can lead to sexual dissatisfaction, feelings of inadequacy, and decreased self-esteem.

Become desirable by using pheromone infused soap

Firstly, orgasms release a surge of endorphins, which are the body’s natural feel-good chemicals. These endorphins can produce a feeling of happiness, euphoria, and relaxation, which can have a positive impact on overall mood and emotional well-being. For many women, the full-bodied orgasm can be a bit elusive, because she is capable of getting an endorphin surge out of a much milder mini orgasm. And some women don’t even realize what they are missing. The full-bodied orgasm leaves a woman weak in the knees and light -headed, which are obvious signs of relaxation. Because the release of endorphins during this orgasm triggers the release of oxytocin, which is a hormone associated with relaxation and stress reduction.

Furthermore, a full-bodied orgasm can also improve self-esteem and body image. Many claim that the fountain of youth is hidden in the full-bodied orgasm, just ask any woman who appears naturally years younger than her peers. Women who are sexually satisfied and able to orgasm often report increased feelings of confidence, self-worth, and positive body image. This can be especially important for women who have experienced trauma, as it can help rebuild their sense of self and improve overall self-esteem.

Give yourself an orgasm

Additionally, a lack of orgasm can have negative effects on mental health. Women who are unable to orgasm may experience feelings of sexual dissatisfaction, which can lead to decreased self-esteem, anxiety, and depression. This can also put a strain on relationships and cause a two-fold conflict within partnerships. The longer women go without a full-bodied orgasm, the less they seek to have one. The less they seek sexual satisfaction, the less a loving partner is getting out of their sexual union. Furthermore, women who struggle with reaching orgasm may also feel ashamed or embarrassed about their bodies or sexual abilities, which can contribute to negative self-image and low self-esteem.

The full-bodied orgasm is a critical component of mental health for women. It provides a release of endorphins and oxytocin, which can improve mood, reduce stress, and improve sleep quality. It also boosts self-esteem and positive body image. On the other hand, a lack of orgasm can lead to feelings of sexual dissatisfaction, decreased self-esteem, and decreased overall well-being. It is important for women to feel comfortable and confident in their sexual experiences, and to seek help if they are experiencing difficulties in reaching orgasm or achieving sexual satisfaction. This can include talking to a trusted friend, seeking therapy, or consulting a healthcare professional.

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Everyone has heard the stories of someone that lives in filth worse than a pigsty. Cockroaches, rotting food, garbage and discarded clothes and other items strewn all over their home. The tendency is to believe that individuals who live like that, are the exception, outcasts from mainstream society, and not the kind of person that might be our next door neighbor. It’s been said many times that the porn industry can often be a canary in a coal mine, giving the pornographer a world view, inconceivable to most. These observations have led, this pornographer to see that the number of human beings who are either ignorant that they’re living in squalor, or worse, have chosen to live in it, is growing exponentially.

Either lazy, badly raised or mentally ill.

People who live in a filth worse than a pigsty, have always been seen as either, lazy, poorly raised or suffering from mental illness. Physics say that objects in motion stay in motion and objects at rest stay at rest. Therefore laziness is easy to understand, because for the last 20 years the Western world has seen a growth in sedentary jobs. Subsequently, when the working day is over, the majority have almost no interest in engaging in any kind of physical activity, including housework.

Modern parenting strategies have also failed to instill both knowledge of how to clean up after oneself and the reasons why it’s so important to take care of one’s residence. It’s a truly sad statement that many of today’s youth know more about the importance of keeping parks and wetlands clean of garbage, than they do their homes. When out in public, they can often be the first individual to snip at someone to put their plastic fast food drink in the right receptacle; but where they live, a similar container will sit spilling on to their floor because they never think to take it to the curb. They live in filth worse than a pigsty, because they never learned any better.

Mental illness, including substance abuse disorders, are quickly growing in number. Prolonged isolation can cause both someone’s mind to fracture and a create addictions. Perhaps one of the saddest and most correct arguments against social media is that it is only an illusion of socialization. In reality, users are all alone and in a form of self-imposed solitary confinement. It also needs to be noted that lock downs added to the number of people suffering with mental health problems while governments and the media refuse to acknowledge the torture that they’ve inflicted on a mass international scale.

Today this increasing filth stems from all of the above

Independent pornographers are witnessing a lot of filth worse than a pigsty. In this era of decentralized porn production, some old school pornographers have resorted to filming “civilians.” (ie: People who are neither professional porn talent nor have intentions of becoming a pro) Therefore filming often takes place in private residences; and it’s here that they glean a collection of horror stories. The kind of horrors that normally are only emergency service workers and landlords encounter.

I walked into the apartment of one 22 year old girl. She was absolutely beautiful, but all I could smell was cat shit, and the place was filled with fleas. What’s more, there wasn’t a bare or clean spot anywhere on the floor that someone could stand in. Perhaps the most remarkable part was she had her Harvard degree hung up for everyone to see. In the weeks following, the performer became both harassing and verbally abusive towards him. In the end getting the footage wasn’t worth the headaches or the bug bites.

So what’s a pornographer to do ?

People who appear in adult videos have to provide the producer with copies of their ID and sign a contract attesting that they are legal age adults, who are consenting to having sex for the purpose of creating pornography. When someone lives in a filth worse than a pigsty, it can be a warning that they might not be legally able to give consent or sign over the rights to the video which they helped produce. The real question is, “what should a pornographer do when they question someone’s mental stability?”

Obviously, they should refuse to film the individual, and it should be comforting to everyone that I don’t. But unlike firefighters or law enforcement, an adult content producer lacks the tools to intervene. Furthermore, given the nature of our work, a pornographer isn’t likely to receive a friendly response from the police or other emergency service. This fact alone cuts our options down to simply walking away; hoping someone else comes along to address the real issue. Because, even bringing in a cleaning crew to make the place livable, or at least passable as a filming location, won’t change the problem that this person has developed the propensity to live in filth worse than a pigsty. After-all, these living conditions not only tax the body physically, they also have an isolating effect those living in squalor, thereby taxing their mental state as well.

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